Hmmmmm lets see, not sure what is wrong with me the past couple of days, OK run down of the last week, had an amazing time in the Daintree rain forest with my boyfriend Billy, now back to Byron home sweet home, maybe I'm missing my family, maybe I'm missing my friends....life is meant to be better out here, better weather, better prospects, the love of my life is out here, so why today do i feel so down and out, I'm usually the one who's positive, but not recently, i know I'm not missing out on anything in Manchester, i know if i went back home now, i wouldn't be any happier, back to what I've always known, nothing new....
maybe I'm not trying hard enough to look for positive things, lets make a list
* great weather
* Billy's here
* Ive got part time work
* I'm healthy
* ................
list of what i have in manchester
* friends
* family
hmmmmmmmm not alot in it really, nothing to really go back for,
i guess the transition from uk to oz was always going to be hard, i guess also that waiting 8 months to come back, i should be more grateful for where i am, theres nothing wrong here, no reason why im bored, why am i bored?
im bored because, ive got none of my good friends here telling me how great i am, im losing my suntan, ive no where to go, nothing to do, how can i be so bloody unhappy, im not depressed or anything, i just cant seem to raise any momentum, not been out the house for 2 days, billy says ive got cabin fever, its not that, where can i go though, we have money, i can always have money off billy, but theres no where to go, no one to do anything with.... at least at home i could pop round to a mates, smoke some weed, chat some shit, but then what, i was doing a job i hated, well i didnt hate it but baggage reclaim at the airport isnt the most exciting job ive ever done, the hours were good though, and the money wasnt bad.
I think it might be a mixture of things, eg i dont know how everything is going to pan out, im not sure what will happen after my visa expires, im not sure what im going to do as a career, does everyone feel like this, just before they turn 28?? what is it, im normally pretty clued up with where im going and what im doing, i feel like im back when i was 20 worrying i was going to end up in the taxi office for the rest of my life.... but u know thngs happen, and u move right along where your meant to go.....
so get philosophical about it, i know its all a learning curve that thngs will work out perfectly, but at the moment i cant see it, as im too caught up in the what ifs and maybes???
thinking too much, thats a problem of mine, and thinking the world revolves around me, maybe i should try looking and thinking about how my behaviour could be effecting billy right about now, i mean who wants to look at my miserable face!
miserable face, miserable face, wheres the smile gone, cant u take the pace?
are you worrying for nothing, are you being daft,
your acting like your on a sinking ship, without a raft!
put the smile back where it should be, your making billy down too look see,
hes trying his best, make sure your okay, all u can do, is look down and say.
nothing, none plus not even a reaction, whats going on, does it bring satisfaction?
to be so miserable, got nothing to say, wont look in his eye, wont look his way.
Your only hurting yourself when your acting this way, its now way to act, and its not okay
pull yourself together, crack a smile and maybe, you'll feel better, just pretend and youll see.
maybe I'm not trying hard enough to look for positive things, lets make a list
* great weather
* Billy's here
* Ive got part time work
* I'm healthy
* ................
list of what i have in manchester
* friends
* family
hmmmmmmmm not alot in it really, nothing to really go back for,
i guess the transition from uk to oz was always going to be hard, i guess also that waiting 8 months to come back, i should be more grateful for where i am, theres nothing wrong here, no reason why im bored, why am i bored?
im bored because, ive got none of my good friends here telling me how great i am, im losing my suntan, ive no where to go, nothing to do, how can i be so bloody unhappy, im not depressed or anything, i just cant seem to raise any momentum, not been out the house for 2 days, billy says ive got cabin fever, its not that, where can i go though, we have money, i can always have money off billy, but theres no where to go, no one to do anything with.... at least at home i could pop round to a mates, smoke some weed, chat some shit, but then what, i was doing a job i hated, well i didnt hate it but baggage reclaim at the airport isnt the most exciting job ive ever done, the hours were good though, and the money wasnt bad.
I think it might be a mixture of things, eg i dont know how everything is going to pan out, im not sure what will happen after my visa expires, im not sure what im going to do as a career, does everyone feel like this, just before they turn 28?? what is it, im normally pretty clued up with where im going and what im doing, i feel like im back when i was 20 worrying i was going to end up in the taxi office for the rest of my life.... but u know thngs happen, and u move right along where your meant to go.....
so get philosophical about it, i know its all a learning curve that thngs will work out perfectly, but at the moment i cant see it, as im too caught up in the what ifs and maybes???
thinking too much, thats a problem of mine, and thinking the world revolves around me, maybe i should try looking and thinking about how my behaviour could be effecting billy right about now, i mean who wants to look at my miserable face!
miserable face, miserable face, wheres the smile gone, cant u take the pace?
are you worrying for nothing, are you being daft,
your acting like your on a sinking ship, without a raft!
put the smile back where it should be, your making billy down too look see,
hes trying his best, make sure your okay, all u can do, is look down and say.
nothing, none plus not even a reaction, whats going on, does it bring satisfaction?
to be so miserable, got nothing to say, wont look in his eye, wont look his way.
Your only hurting yourself when your acting this way, its now way to act, and its not okay
pull yourself together, crack a smile and maybe, you'll feel better, just pretend and youll see.
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